A funny thing happened to me yesterday.
I was told by a very lovely person (Zenobia Southcombe, to be precise – please do head over and check out her site!) that my “enthusiasm is so catchy”!
This was very flattering, for two reasons. 1) I haven’t actually felt all that enthusiastic about my life pursuits recently, so I was happy to know I hadn’t outwardly let that bring me down all that much and 2) I’d actually been clinging to HER enthusiasm for HER life pursuits the last several days in an attempt to catch on to some of HERS! Lol.
But this got me to thinking about the impact our social groups have our own personal attitudes and feelings. This conversation happened in a very nice G+ group I happen to be a part of, and in this particular discussion, several members and I talked about how we can tell whether or not we are being true to ourselves in what we’re doing in our lives. Essentially, how do you know when you are “following your dreams”? The answers were varied but similar, and the final answer from consensus ran along the lines of something very simple, but so very often overlooked, “Does it make you feel happy? Does it make you smile? Does it bring you joy?”
We also talked about the importance of support groups like that particular G+ community, where like-minded, polite, and wonderful people could gather and offer their words of encouragement and enthusiasm. And it’s very true that during the bad days, or the slumps (because we all have them), I do indeed heavily rely on my support networks to carry me through.
But these aren’t the usual, run-of-the-mill slumps. These are slumps in energy for the pursuit of my big, broad life goals. That can sometimes be a lot of pressure. It can many times seem so very overwhelming, and IS in reality quite exhausting.
This is when people who are “following their dreams” need their network of other people who are following their dreams. This is when I need my Wordwraiths, my favorite Tweeters, my fandom Facebook groups, my fellow artist friends, my bloggers-at-arms, my G+ communities.
And sometimes, they need me, too.
Because following your dreams is really HARD, actually. It takes a lot of work. Worse, it usually takes a lot of time. And sometimes it’s REALLY hard to remember to pace yourself, to be patient, to keep an eye on the big picture.
Much like, say … running a half-marathon. (And if you read my previous marathon-related post here, you know how terrible I am at sticking to a regular, long-term training program!)
I have to glean enthusiasm and energy and gumption from others in my social networks sometimes. It’s such a long, drawn out process, this “following your dreams” thing.
The first few miles breeze by; you’re pumped, full of energy, raring to go! You’re ready to start making changes in your life! Ready to map your way to success through small, manageable goals! Ready to begin making the changes that will get you where you want to be! Ready to create a life in which you are true to yourself and thus truly happy!
… Then about mile 5 or 6 you’re wondering why you even started this in the first place. You think you’ll never reach the finish line, you have sooooo much further to go, your progress seems agonizingly slow, you see all these other professional marathon runners zoom by and you’re just like … WTF!? You think about how much easier things were when you were sitting on the couch, snacking on popcorn and watching Netflix.
THIS is the slump I’m talking about. The slump I’ve been battling myself over the past few weeks. Sometimes you think it might just be easier to give up. To quit the race. To just chill and let the “Saggin’ Wagon” come scoop you up with the rest of the stragglers. Have a nice comfy ride back to the tents.
But then … someone grabs your flailing hand. They physically (or emotionally) drag you forward.
This is when we need each other! This is when we need our marathon group around us, to keep dragging us forward, to let us follow in their slip stream, to hold up that hand in the middle of the churning masses and be like, “It’s okay, you can make it, look I’m doing it too, follow me!” And then eventually we’ll crawl back out of that slump, and catch our second wind (maybe around mile 10 or so, when we look back and see how far we’ve come!), we get re-energized, and we plow onward again, until finally, at long last, exhausted and battered and triumphant (and with a knee that feels like hell itself), we cross the finish line, we reach our goals, we succeed.
I’ve only been seriously in this race since March of 2013, but already my patience tends to wear thin. This isn’t even the first time I’ve dealt with these feelings! And yet I can’t stop them. I just have to acknowledge them, be logical, keep going, and wait for them to pass.
In the meantime, however, I will continue to rely on my amazing support networks to keep me in the race! So thank you, all of you out there who have managed to keep me sane through the last year and a half. You are all amazing. Thanks for being there to lead by example, coach through the tough times, distract me from the pain, and keep me limping on toward that finish line.
For what it’s worth, I’ll endeavor to be here for you, too, even if all I’m doing at the moment is sitting on the curbside gasping for air … I’ll cheer you on from the sidelines! 😉
Go after what you want, do what you love, follow your dreams! We’ve all come such a long way from where we started. We’ve all accomplished so much, made so much progress in the right direction – toward the goals that are true to ourselves, toward what will make us happy, toward what will transform us into inspiration for others in the earlier stages of the same path.
SO GO GET ‘EM!
… I’ll be right behind you!
“Sane”? Pfffffffffttt… 😉
Lovely post JRF. It has your vibrancy stamped all over it, even if you’re sitting on the curbside. You cheer very loudly.
As one who has noticeably flagged in enthusiasm over recent weeks (well, more capability to maintain the pace rather than enthusiasm as such), I also find your kicks in the backside hugely motivational and supportive. You hit the nail on the head with your summary of the value and importance these networks hold for each of us.
Hrm, good point, I can’t really claim to be sane, can I? 😉
Well, I’m glad you can still hear my cheering! I think I might have got my breath back now … might be back in the race at long last! Woot!
I’m glad my occasional kicks have been motivational rather than painful. I hope I can continue to be a source of that motivation and support for you, indeed, though I admit I have eased up on you of late due to the impending arrival of your little one. 🙂 I’ll give you a few months break … but then … it’s back to the race, you!
(…Just remember I still have the badgers!…)
Amen!
😀
Thanks for the flattering mention, Lightning Bug :p I have to admit I’m at the beginning of a slump at the moment – but like you said, I know it will pass, and I have many wonderful people to lean on for a while.
We’re all in this together! Let’s make the world a place where following our dreams is not just possible, but the norm xx
You are very welcome, my dear! As I said, you earned it. 😉
Ugh, the slumps! They drive me bonkers! I think I’m finally on the uphill out of mine though, so maybe I can help pull you out of yours! Yes, they all eventually pass, but it sure isn’t fun to be stuck in one.
YES! Love it! Let’s make it the norm for sure! 😀
I remember talking to my sister about why I wanted to stay in a teaching career. I told her that if I could just 10% more children actually following their dreams, the world would be a better place.
But now I reckon… let’s aim for 100%
I tell all the younger people I know to do the same – follow their dreams! How funny … I was just talking to MY sister yesterday about how when we are younger (at least here in the States, where students go straight into college/university right after highschool), there is so much pressure to decide what your career will be when you still have no clue what it is you would really enjoy. Not to mention you have no real-world or life experience from which to draw any valuable information from, which makes it nigh impossible to choose a field of study that is true to what you really want. Choosing incorrectly just helps weed out the “no’s” of course, but we both felt like when we were younger, the “dream” type of careers were pushed out of the realm of possibility by the necessity of rushing into a choice, or being pressured to find a “real” job, or something that would make some kind of money. Now we both have a MUCH better understanding of who we are and what we want, and we’re both moving in that direction, but … if only we had listened to the wiser adults when we were younger who told us to be true to ourselves! 😉 (Of course, does any young person really ever take the advice of an older person?? You’re a teacher, have you had much success with that? Lol)
Haha! I remember the same thing – and honestly it hasn’t changed much. Here in NZ it’s expectation for a lot of people to go straight to university. It certainly was for me.
My careers counsellor suggested engineering as I was good at maths and there are jobs / money there. From what my students say, a lot of parents and teachers still think about what a ‘good career’ will be.
I’m happy to say I’ve had some success with getting students to follow their dreams – or at least to consider them an option. It depends most upon how much the parents have suggested traditional careers, and what family expectations are. I was really pleased with one particular girl this year who decided not to drop Dance (as a school subject) after we talked about *why* she was intending to study medicine, and realising it was cause that’s what her parents wanted. I didn’t discourage her from doing medicine – I encouraged her not to give up dance in the process.
Some of the teens these days are really onto it in the “follow your dreams” idea. We, as adults, have to make sure we don’t stifle those dreams.
I LOVE that you were able to help one of your students realize she didn’t want to give up dance. I hope she sticks with it and really does what she ends up wanting to do. Parental pressure can be very persuasive, and unfortunately lead kids into careers they really don’t enjoy. I find it phenomenal how much the satisfaction with your career can impact every other aspect of life. I’m only just realizing it now, of course, because I’m only just now listening to myself, ha. But now that I’ve started doing that, I wouldn’t give it up for anything! It’s amazing how it all just starts to snowball, too, and gain momentum as you go, and all add up into exactly what we want if we just have the courage to try for it in the first place! 🙂 Good luck to you, and I’m so happy you are a teacher so that you can encourage the young people to follow their dreams! 😀
I was so pleased to hear she didn’t 🙂 Parents are so well-intentioned, they just want their children to be secure. I get that. But I don’t think it’s the way forward. Of course, some genuinely want to become doctors or lawyers and that should be encouraged, too.
We don’t need to be rich to be happy – we need enough to live comfortably. One thing that pushed me forward was the reminder that I don’t need to become rich and famous to succeed as an artist. There are plenty of writers, musicians, painters etc who make enough money through their work to live comfortably and keep making art. Hmmm I think there’s a blog post in that!
You are incredibly motivating! It takes a lot of your time and energy to write these motivational gems, and I really appreciate them! I always feel like I’ve been picked up, dusted off, and put back on the path after I read one of them! Thank you! 😀
Aww, well thank you! I’m so glad you enjoy them! It does take a lot of time and energy, but it’s so worth it! Not only because these posts seem to resonate with other people who find them helpful, but really, they help ME loads too! I usually write them as a self-pep-talk, honestly, when I need to gather my thoughts and condense the tangle of feelings ricocheting all over my mind. Then once I have them down and coherent, things make more sense. Bonus, then it’s there for me to come back and read later, and remember what I dealt with and how to get through it, or what I accomplished to recognize it and not forget. 🙂 This post specifically was the last hurdle to get out of my slump. I think without it, I’d still be on the curb. But I have my second wind now, so I’m off again! Thanks for reading and commenting, and I’m really glad you found the post motivational! <3